It's all Amy's fault. I've worked out she is the reason we did so many Ridiculous Things last year on nights out (getting tear-gassed, narrowly escaping gang rape by the river, sitting on park benches drinking wine instead of going into bars like Normal People...) because so far this year (academic year, I mean) I haven't done anything too Ridiculous, but Amy is here for a week and so far we have been the cause of a mass brawl in the street, had a dispute with two boys on scooters and one of us had a one night stand, I won't tell you who but it certainly wasn't me because, as regular readers will know, about seven months ago I took a Vow Of Celibacy in an effort to limit the amount of Ridiculous Things I was getting up to.
Other fabulous things that have happened since Amy has come to visit:
-I put my watch in the washing machine
-I left my favourite (only) scarf in a club
-My laptop is fuuuucked
-I lost my passport. Yep. Don't talk to me about it, looks like I'll be going home for Christmas crouched down between two crates of Camembert in the back of a lorry.
On the plus side, Amy brought me Dairy Milk, Haribo sweets, Maryland cookies, English magazines, an advent calender and she even smuggled in some Tesco Extra Special Pork and Red Onion Sausages. I've eaten all the chocolate, sweets and biscuits (and most of Kayt's), but the sausages are in my freezer; I can eat them on Christams Day if I really do get stuck here because I lost my FUCKING PASSPORT.
In preparation for my amazingly detailed account of the Ridiculous Weekend we have just enjoyed, you should read these posts about Le Longhop, because that is where we went on Saturday and let's just say that the past came back to haunt us...
Ghetto Princesses Part 1-
We instigated an aggressive dance-off and made some new friends
Ghetto Princesses Part 2-
Our 'new friends' stopped us from being gang-raped and one of us was tear-gassed. No, really
The bouncer of Le Longhop wouldn't let us in and we got into a little dispute... unfortunately said bouncer featured very heavily in our night out yesterday/this morning
I'm really Paranoid now that everybody has lost interest because I haven't posted for so long, but I'll write the first part of my Ridiculous Weekend tomorrow morning, in the Time Window I have between teaching and waitressing. Please read it... I've lost or broken every single thing I own of value, you have to feel soz for me and don't stop reading.