Wednesday, 25 May 2011

Shallow Waters

I've cheered right up now!!! I watched this French film with the kids today called 'Nos jours heureux' and there was the most beautiful little boy in it called Youssef. I asked the girls which boy they fancied the most, because it's a film about a summer camp so there's loads of kids in it, and they both said Youssef and I said "He would be my choice too if I was younger" and then I had the most Incredible Thought.

"When was this film made girls?" I asked.

We waited until the end of the credits and it was made in 2006. He looks quite young in the film but they always cast teenage actors as children, so I guessed that actually he was about fifteen when the film was made... making him the same age as me!!

A quick Google search has shown me that he is actually nineteen. Humph. That's too young.

I can feel a depressing slump coming on again...

My arms are looking nice and brown though!!

I spent all of Saturday sunbathing by an outdoor pool, and it bloody worked, I forsee the next seven weekends spent exactly the same way.

Actually, it was quite traumatic, because I didn't get up in time to go with my friends so I had to go in on my own. My friends who have been before said bring picnic food and stuff, because you can stay there all day eating and tanning, so I brought two baguettes and a big bag of swimwear stuff. I thought there would be a different way to get to the outdoors pool and the sunbathing area, but there wasn't, so I was wandering around the changing rooms, fully dressed and carrying bread, getting more and more panicky. These pool attendants were laughing at me and speaking to me in French, and I couldn't find my way out of the changing rooms. They asking me if I was going to take my dress off and I just thought they were being pervy, but they were asking me because the only way to get to the outdoor pool is to walk through the indoor swimming pool.

Eventually I found my way out of the changing rooms, but the 'way out' was a changing cubicle with no back to it, like a secret passageway for fucking Psychic Swimmers. On the other side of the cubicle there were showers and lots of people who were very wet and they all stared at me as I walked past them fully-clothes carrying two baguettes and my handbag.

I felt more and more like I was doing something terribly wrong. At the end of the changing rooms was what looked suspiciously like the entrance to the swimming pool and I mean the entrance into the actual pool, filled with water. I had to walk through a shallow pool and it went around the corner. For a whole minute I thought the water was going to get deeper and deeper and that I was going to have to swim to the outdoor pool in my dress and with my bread.

THANK GOD the pool was only ankle-deep. I was able to get out and walk around the swimming pool, although I did look a bit weird walking around not in my swimming costume. I finally found the girls outside and it was all fine, but I won't be taking two baguettes with me next time. By the way, we saw the two most beautiful men I have ever seen in my life, worth the 5 euros entry fee alone. Unfortunately, they sat and watched as Anne and Clare tried to teach me how to swim, without much luck. Oh well, the doggy-paddle's still sexy isn't it?

Anyway I'm all cheered up, and all it took was a bit of a tan and the prospect that a fit, young actor I have never met might be the same age as me. I always suspected I was a shallow idiot.

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